Shortly after my last update, actually. The vet had been out to meet the foals and check them over, and said they were healthy. She was dead less than 48 hours later. I found her in the morning. It was seriously traumatizing, I felt much more bonded to her than to Newsie, and I feel like I failed her. The vet examined her body and couldn't determine cause of death. We decided not to do an autopsy, but buried her in the small pasture overlooking the arena. I ordered a stall nameplate to mark her grave.
I don't know if skipping the autopsy was the right decision. I'll never know for sure why she died, although bloodwork drawn from Newsie showed that he had increased white blood cells so he was started on antibiotics. Rhodocacus is not uncommon in nurse mare foals and can be fatal. Sansa was just days old when she was taken from her mother - Newsie was born late last year, so he is quite a bit older and stronger. If they had the same infection, it makes sense that he would be able to fight it off.
I've cried a lot. She was a sweet, sweet pony and I think she was really special. I was really feeling like a failure because I had tried to rescue her, but I couldn't save her. A friend put this into context for me that made me feel better: for over half her life, I loved her and cared for her and made sure she got enough to eat. That was my job. I loved her and she loved me back. It's the best I could have done for her. It has to be enough.
Good and safe. We don’t have to worry about her now. -The Hunger Games
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